It's a Woman's World!
Welcome to all the new girl-babies in my life (and one boy-child)! It has been a bumper crop this summer. All of you have been wanted, prayed for, fretted over and eagerly awaited. We thought some of you would never come! But here you are. I know how happy you have made your parents, grandparents, aunties, uncles and other villagers, and we villagers are happy to have you and your parents in our lives!
First and middle names only and drum roll please...
Lauren Malone, July 16 at 5:14 p.m., 7 lbs 6 oz, 20 in. - Gainesville, GA
Kathleen Madelyn Boudica, July 18 at 5:06 p.m, 7 lb, 2 oz; 20.5 in. - Houston, TX
Isaac Alexander, July 23 at 10:58 p.m., 8 lbs. 8.8 oz. - Houston, TX
Rachel Kathryn, August 7 at 3:19 p.m., 6 lbs, 11 oz. 19.75 in. - Lubbock, TX
Wow! You mamas have been busy. And dads too!
It's interesting, these four babies are from parents I claim as friends from almost my entire span of adult life. One is the first child of one of my dearest college friends. One is the first child of a woman I have sung with for the last several years. Two are the children of good friends I never would have met, but for treasured friendships with the amazing people who introduced me to them.
And there are more coming. There are at least two friends of mine ready to pop as we speak.
My mom recently asked me if I had any desire to have children of my own. I carefully considered her question and said no. It is not for lack of a maternal instinct. Anyone who knows me well will tell you I have a "mama streak" a mile wide and I'm not afraid to use it. But I have never felt that desire, that "ovary twitch" as some of my friends call it, to birth my own children.
As one who is (or at least, has been) gifted at burying deep feelings and/or denying fairly primal desires, I have occasionally doubted the veracity of my assertions. But nothing, not poring over all of the baby pictures I have been sent, visiting the babies in the hospital, not even the wondrously enjoyable play time I got to spend with my kiddos in Buffalo has made me feel vacant, or unfulfilled or desirous. I like that sense of certainty.
I am fast approaching 40 (44 days and counting), which I believe was what prompted my mom's inquiry. There are a lot of things I have been evaluating as this milestone approaches. I have been deciding what works in my life and what doesn't. What I have that I need and what I don't have that I want.
Yes, the Project has been part of that process. More on that later. Ultimately, getting this degree is part of that process. I am (deep shudder) in the process of buying a house. More on that later too.
I don't even think that my lack of a procreational desire has anything to do with my persistent singlehood. While the traditional progression is nice, if I truly wanted a child, I'd have one by now, with or without a partner. I dated a guy with a kid once, and I was ok with the idea of stepmotherhood. The older I get, the more likely the prospect that a man I marry would have his own children, for whatever that's worth. I'm way ok with auntiehood. I love that to pieces!
Of course, all this is well and good. The last chapter on all of this has yet to be written (there's always a news story about an ill-advised sexagenarian pregnancy). But I feel safe in saying that babymaking is like (insert honorable but not always desirable pursuit here): great idea, just not for me.
As for the Project? No releases, but no rehirings either. I have been in a travel- and way funky schedule-induced holding pattern. Fear not. Progress is just around the corner...
First and middle names only and drum roll please...
Lauren Malone, July 16 at 5:14 p.m., 7 lbs 6 oz, 20 in. - Gainesville, GA
Kathleen Madelyn Boudica, July 18 at 5:06 p.m, 7 lb, 2 oz; 20.5 in. - Houston, TX
Isaac Alexander, July 23 at 10:58 p.m., 8 lbs. 8.8 oz. - Houston, TX
Rachel Kathryn, August 7 at 3:19 p.m., 6 lbs, 11 oz. 19.75 in. - Lubbock, TX
Wow! You mamas have been busy. And dads too!
It's interesting, these four babies are from parents I claim as friends from almost my entire span of adult life. One is the first child of one of my dearest college friends. One is the first child of a woman I have sung with for the last several years. Two are the children of good friends I never would have met, but for treasured friendships with the amazing people who introduced me to them.
And there are more coming. There are at least two friends of mine ready to pop as we speak.
My mom recently asked me if I had any desire to have children of my own. I carefully considered her question and said no. It is not for lack of a maternal instinct. Anyone who knows me well will tell you I have a "mama streak" a mile wide and I'm not afraid to use it. But I have never felt that desire, that "ovary twitch" as some of my friends call it, to birth my own children.
As one who is (or at least, has been) gifted at burying deep feelings and/or denying fairly primal desires, I have occasionally doubted the veracity of my assertions. But nothing, not poring over all of the baby pictures I have been sent, visiting the babies in the hospital, not even the wondrously enjoyable play time I got to spend with my kiddos in Buffalo has made me feel vacant, or unfulfilled or desirous. I like that sense of certainty.
I am fast approaching 40 (44 days and counting), which I believe was what prompted my mom's inquiry. There are a lot of things I have been evaluating as this milestone approaches. I have been deciding what works in my life and what doesn't. What I have that I need and what I don't have that I want.
Yes, the Project has been part of that process. More on that later. Ultimately, getting this degree is part of that process. I am (deep shudder) in the process of buying a house. More on that later too.
I don't even think that my lack of a procreational desire has anything to do with my persistent singlehood. While the traditional progression is nice, if I truly wanted a child, I'd have one by now, with or without a partner. I dated a guy with a kid once, and I was ok with the idea of stepmotherhood. The older I get, the more likely the prospect that a man I marry would have his own children, for whatever that's worth. I'm way ok with auntiehood. I love that to pieces!
Of course, all this is well and good. The last chapter on all of this has yet to be written (there's always a news story about an ill-advised sexagenarian pregnancy). But I feel safe in saying that babymaking is like (insert honorable but not always desirable pursuit here): great idea, just not for me.
As for the Project? No releases, but no rehirings either. I have been in a travel- and way funky schedule-induced holding pattern. Fear not. Progress is just around the corner...
posted by YankeeHobbit | 12:40 PM
1 Comments:
We need to have your divaness meet the princess sometime. She is truly beautiful (and that's more than just Mommy saying so).
I think knowing or not knowing you want to breed is actually a freeing place to be (if that makes sense; I'm pretty sleep deprived).
As far as the whole really old parent thing, catch Patton Oswald's commentary on that sometime.
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